What If You Had To Give a Speech to a Room Full of Every Person You’ve Ever Slept With?
Someone asked me this at a dinner party once. We were playing the game Hotseat, where one person is peppered with questions from the group, and you must answer immediately.
I was on the hot seat. And one of the questions: ‘you are at a dinner party where the only other guests are everyone you have ever had sex with. You need to give a short speech — go.”
It’s easy to start with the jokes — ‘I’m sorry’; or ‘wow, it’s a pretty small crowd here tonight.’ But, seriously, what would you say to the room?
I would, of course, express appreciation for their role in making me the — reasonably — competent and compassionate lover that I am today.
To my first, I would legitimately apologize. Even though I lost my virginity reasonably late in life, I still feel I was not quite ready. I can remember liking this girl’s company and finding her quite attractive. But there was a spark missing, and when she pushed me to have sex, I went along with it mainly because, for my tiny teenage mind, it seemed like the expected thing. Boys should not turn down sex.
Number two was a better story, and I think she would show up to the dinner in good spirits and be happy to reconnect and swap stories. The second girl I had sex…
