How to Balance The Sexy, The Intellectual, and The Adventurer

Chai Steeves
2 min readNov 6, 2023
Photo by Martin Sanchez on Unsplash

I’ve been having a hard time motivating myself to write lately. As those who follow me know, my writing tends to focus on issues of a sexual nature — sexual exploration, sexual advice, sexual science. When I’ve tried to steer toward other topics, I tend not to get a lot of love.

I consider myself a sex and sexuality blogger.

So, what do I do when I feel that my more interesting thoughts are non-sexual? Recently, I’ve been spending more time reading — I’m trying to read the top 100 books in classical literature. I’m also diving back into the more physically adventurous parts of my life, spending more time surfing and rock climbing and a lot more time in nature. And, to add to that, I’m going through an exciting phase at work, so I’m spending more of my leisure time thinking about that and how we leave a healthy planet for our children.

All this to say, while I’m still loving having sex, it’s not where my writing and creative interests seem to be.

Even just writing this reminds me that I miss that interest. I really want to endeavor to rekindle my creativity there. Some of my favorite people are very sexual, and I value my connection with them — not just the physical but the creative and intellectual expressions of sexuality. So, I need to get on that — carving out a little more time for sexual thoughts, creativity, and writing.

At the same time, I enjoy the parts of my life I’ve opened (or reopened) to literature, adventure, and environmental consciousness. Not only does it keep me well-balanced, but it also feeds my full set of passions and desires. Right now, I’m sitting in a youth hostel in Nicaragua, surrounded by travelers and surfers having the time of my life.

So, as I think of how this affects my writing, I’m in an expansionary mood. I want to write more. Ideally, I would like to continue to be read by lots of people. But I don’t think I’m willing to go back to pure sex writing to get that. So, I’m going to try a bit of a pivot in my writing. Instead of getting only my sexual and sexy thoughts, you’re going to get the Full Monty.

I hope you all continue to be entertained as I broaden.



Chai Steeves

eclectic guy - likes sexuality, politics, business, relationships, celebrity trivia...