I really need to be reexamining my life — and fortunately there was a stripper who was happy to help out.
When I agreed to meet a friend for after-work drinks last Tuesday, this was not where I was expecting the evening to go. We usually go to pretty nice places, and this was no exception — a wine bar downtown with a sexy, tattooed waitress who is a million years younger than us but who likes to flirt.
It was a nice reunion -until it tipped. This friend is a super-intelligent guy with eclectic interests, so conversations with him are interesting and wide-ranging — politics, literature, business… the whole range.
But, inevitably, he almost always pivots to whether women find him attractive. He was not a popular kid-super dorky, an immigrant, and had very few friends. Some people found him interesting because he was intelligent, quirky, and kind — but no one saw him as attractive.
Fast forward 30 years; it’s a whole different story. He’s highly successful at work, handsome, and has learned to turn his quirky personality into one that is charming and appealing to many.
But he’s also now married. So while he relishes in the fact that women now show interest in him, he is faithful to his wife and doesn’t want to reciprocate that affection. Moreover — and this is the weirdest part — he’s pretty much asexual. While he loves being wanted by women, he’s not that into sex. He shared in confidence once that he once went home with a female bartender after a late night of drinking. She was, apparently, a little surprised that he only wanted to chat and look at her album collection.
And that is how, my friends, we ended up in the seediest strip club in town at 9:30 on a Tuesday night. This was not the first time, so I wasn’t all that shocked to be there. But it doesn’t mean I liked it.
A strip club on a Tuesday early evening is a depressing place to be. Firstly, we were virtually the only ones there. ; aside from a few deadbeat-looking regulars, we were the only fresh meat. As such, the tiny handful of dancers was all over us.
My friend — as he does — disappeared into a private room with one of the ladies almost immediately. This left me as the only ‘eligible’ guy in the place, in a room full of…