A Casual Threesome with a Coworker?

Is that a really, really bad idea?

Photo by Roman Khripkov on Unsplash

Have you felt destined to have a relationship with someone? We all have.

But what about the opposite? A person with whom that destiny seems to be actively conspiring to assure you never get into bed?

That is my current dilemma. For over six years, my wife and I have had a wonderful, flirtatious relationship with a young lady. There is great chemistry on all sides and, at a conceptual level, a great desire to have a little sexy fling.

But destiny can be a bitch.

I initially met her as a student — a graduate student. I was not her professor or direct supervisor but her ultimate boss. She was bright, fun, and mature. I liked her a lot, but to be honest, as a student, I had not even considered there could be a sexual connection. I genuinely don’t feel that way toward students, so it was not a consideration then. But she was really fun, with great energy.

I thought the world of her and, upon graduation, arranged for her to work for my wife’s firm. My wife and I got to know her better as a colleague and learned we had many similar interests, including a pretty liberal view on sex with friends. Over the years of working with my wife, she often alluded to how fun it would be if we all — my wife, me, and her — could go out and cut loose sometimes. She liked the same sort of music scene and recreational drugs as us, and more than once, she said she was pretty clear that it would be fun to get naked together.

But she worked with my wife. Again, my wife did not supervise her directly, but she was her ultimate boss. Damn.

Well, this summer, the window seemed to finally open. She was feeling pretty tired from the pace of work and decided to take the summer off and transition to a new job. She traveled over the summer and asked us for drinks upon her return — wanting to catch up and lean into our social relationship.

We went out and had a great time. The social (and low-key sexual) energy was palpable.

But then I did the unthinkable — I offered her a job. She really is so bright and talented. She’s since accepted.

But, once again, she is out of the sex-zone. Ooops… I did it again.